You know how sometimes all of a sudden something happens? But then it feels like the most normal thing in the world and you forget to mention it? I guess this has just happened:
Things with Ken have been literally like a rollercoaster. Up. And down. And up again. And all the way down. You get the point. I mean, again, it has not even been a week since my last post but everything has changed. But let me start from where I left off:
We started talking again. We got to know us a bit better. Yes we still fought at some points, but it didn’t last as long as when we first wanted to meet. All of a sudden he asked me out again. I was so caught off guard by this, because I just thought he had given up. This time I was up for it though. He would be off the whole day, we decided for another meeting point and there was no fighting about it. Although for the whole time, we still kept joking about just being friends. We have also talked on the phone now, which I hate, but then again loved with him. Every evening I hoped he would call. Who am I? And what is up with my life? So today is the day and I am not yet sure what to expect. I really like him. Yet in the back of my mind there are a lot of things which make me wonder if things could work out. We have a lot of different views on life, and I don’t want another Momo. I will just have to let things go slowly I guess (yet I am hoping for a kiss, what is wrong with me?!)
Fortunately, at least things with the ex have died down again. Yesterday I was out with my school friends to have a drink and I bumped into a friend of Momo. I was in shock for a few seconds, but then just passed. Why would I say hello, I only saw him once or twice and he probably didn’t even remember me (although he had kept saying that we were a perfect match). I wasn’t shocked because I saw him, but because I thought how funny this situation was. I kept begging Momo not to go out and have a drink. And only yesterday did I really understand that the problem wasn’t the going out part, but his friends. I didn’t want to go out, because I didn’t like his friends. And now I’m here, going out with my friends every week and I am totally fine with it. No anxiety. No panic attacks. Funny how the world works, huh?
Then there’s Redfox. I actually feel a bit unfair that I am dating Ken and he didn’t get a chance. He has been constantly there for me, making me laugh and being overly protective (and maybe that’s the problem. Because I know it’s not what he actually is like). I have told myself that after the date today, I’ll probably know more about things with Ken and therefore might or might not let the conversation with Redfox die down a little. We’ll see. He has still asked me for a date and it’s cute, but y’all know.
Aaaanyway. I’ll let you know soon enough, how the date went.