So actually shortly after I wrote up that post, I received a message from Yavin. I’m gonna simply state what our conversation was like and then write down my thoughts. Because I need to get them out one last time and then I’m done. For good.
Him: Hey, I do understand your argumentations, but we never really talked to each other or were serious in any way. Or I didn’t read it as more than just texting each other every once in a while. I am very busy right now and simply forgot about our date. But we only set a date, nothing fixed. So I don’t really see the problem. I’m sorry if you thought differently, I didn’t realise it was that important to you.
Me: Well, that it was just texting every once in a while for you I noticed and that’s why I asked you what you were thinking of this and YOU said that you were interested. I know that we simply set a date, because YOU said you’d text me with a time and place, because you are so busy. But it’s okay if it wasn’t that important to you, so I know it was just wasting time for you.
Him: I didn’t say that. But as I said before, I never took it as serious or that you were interested. We were fooling around and never really talked about any serious stuff. As if I had the time to just fool around.
Me: I told you pretty clearly that I am interested and that I like you. So don’t you dare say I didn’t show you!
Him: As said before, I didn’t take it as that. But let’s just leave this be, you’re just mad and disappointed, so no good start at all.
Me: I’ve told you before that I am not going to force you into talking to me or getting to know me. That’s not me and if you’re not into talking to me, that’s okay. Just like I’m not going to force you to talk to me now. If you’re giving up now, that’s okay, I’ll accept it. I just thought we matched pretty good. Sure I am disappointed, you would be the same if you were looking forward to a date that much and then he’d dump you, right? You were the first one I trusted in a very long time and that’s why I am so mad. But as I said, I’m gonna leave it to you. Sorry that this happened.
Really? I don’t even know why I apologised, as it wasn’t my fault at all. He tried to turn it around to make this my fault, but I was over this point of self-loath, because I knew I didn’t do anything wrong. I told him about my emotions pretty early on, so he wasn’t in the place to tell me that I was just fooling around!
And to not start something new, he didn’t reply to that last message to me again. SURPRISE! But honestly? I didn’t expect him to. No one else would have given him a second chance after that bullshit and yet I did. I now have deleted his number, unfollowed him on instagram and restricted him on facebook (will unfriend him soon enough). I’m not in a place to play such games, if he has a problem in reading things into pretty damn clear words.. well that’s his problem. I’m not going to run after him anymore. Sure I still feel like it was a loss, as we were having a lot of fun. But let’s be real here. I told him so many times that I was not looking for fun, I told him I liked him, and that I was interested. If this still made him think that I was not interested, I don’t know how fucked up his damn brain is. And if he really is that dumb, I am not actually sure this is a guy for me anyway.
So goodbye Yavin for good this time!